Thursday nights

So Thursday nights can be torture. On Friday afternoon I usually get to head home from wherever I’m at and am so ready.  Which means the night before seems to last forever.  But tonight, I tried a new craft beer, got awesome take out BBQ,  and scarfed it down while watching Friends With Benefits starring Justin Timberlake while in big knee socks and my boyfriends big yellow sweatshirt in a comfy chair in my hotel room. My best Thursday night out of town yet.

my version of Yin Yang or something like that

Still in Chicago, still need a vacation, still getting older, more paranoid but hopefully smarter and wiser. I consider myself a well rounded, even tempered person most of the time. I may get angry, but chances are I will think before I speak, and end up giving you a speech on why something happened that I did not like but it was probably for the best. I hate myself most at those times. I mean – why do I need to justify why things happens beyond my control and try to make peace with them? Well, that is who I am, and if that annoys you – be aware, I annoy myself as well.

Examples? Sure, why not?

One – I have the flu, have had the stomach flu for about 4 days now and am so grumpy. I mean – take a look at my blog, I love food. I take pictures of food I have in restaurants that are new to me and share them with friends and family on Facebook. So a stomach flu puts a damper on things. I can eat, and continue trying. And end up in the bathroom at inconvenient times. Yes, my drive to my work location in Chicago was awesome today. (insert sarcastic look here) But I have already tried to put an optimistic spin on it – without working out or dieting, I lost a few pounds. Yes, I look heinous – tired and hungry – but it was probably time for me to appreciate the fact that I eat well most the time. See, always looking for that optimistic spin. And as a coworker mentioned today – I am lucky, some people wished they could eat but can’t afford it. And so I added guilt to my list of symptoms.

Two – This month sucks for finances. It just does and nothing I can do about it. Yes, I could actually consider a sugar daddy but that seems pathetic at age 40, and I do adore my boyfriend. My car is on the edge of ruin, but (warning, positive spin) it is so close to being paid off. Which means the repairs to it cost more than it is worth, but I am determined to pay it off someday. Also my daughter is a senior in high school which means her book fees and senior pictures hit the checkbook this month as well. And any college applications she decides to send in – BUT ( big positive bright spots coming!!!!) Her dad, my ex is active in her life and pays half of these expenses. More? A family member is a fabulous photographer and did an amazing job with her senior pictures. I cried ( not like me) when I saw them and decided – I will go broke getting all the ones I think should be framed all over the house. I am sure every parent thinks their child or children are beautiful – but I was in awe. I actually wondered – did I give birth to her? Is it possible that someone far more attractive was actually her mother, and I just lucked into raising her? The cost of things this month just became less stressful. One day she will be on her own, and I won’t think about the expenses, I will just wish I was taking care of her again.

Three – Co parenting after a divorce is hard. But it gets better. The guilt of having your marriage fail and how it affects your kid haunts you for a long time maybe forever. I see examples of parents who divorced and remarried others and are able to be in the same room and even talk without an obvious tension – and think- I want that! When do we get “there”? I don’t know but I know we both do what we can to be there for her. And (bright spot) you may even have moments where she is voted Homecoming Queen at high school and feel a rare moment of being on the same page – being happy at the same moment, at the same thing, knowing the one thing you did together was her and that surpasses all the mess.

Four – Being on the road, missing those I love and feeling like my life is so unorganized. But I do have a job, I get to travel for it and I have people that help me because they love me. Now – the dogs that are tearing up my house – well, they seem to be pissed that I am gone so much but I have to assume they do it because they miss me. pathetic, can’t even stay mad at the dogs…

Five – I have a Love / Hate relationship  with the notion of romantic relationships or being “in love”. It is a miserable thing for someone like me, to have a romantic brain when it comes to others but to be so negative when it comes to really thinking in terms of forever for myself. I can easily see and experience the highs of being in love – but I do have a sense of wondering – when do the good times end? What happens then? Can I plan for that – prep myself for the inevitable? Much like everything else – I balance it with humor. The very patient boyfriend plays along with my musings  – of course we would arrange playdates for our dogs, and still talk about work stuff – and go for road trips. Who else would we do that with? It is easier for me to plan for disaster, then plan on happiness.

But I am getting better. After all – much like traveling someplace new – you either take the risk and go big or stay home. And I choose to take the risk.

Travel Tips

My disclaimer for this blog is that I am so overdue for a vacation. But it is scheduled and I will regain my sanity. This post is probably how a lot of people who work in Hospitality feel at times. And I promise,  to also look at the other side. Here we go…
Being obnoxious and asking me why I don’t have the power to get you a better rate – amazingly won’t get me to give you a better rate.
Tip well, and be gracious when your server is very busy, they will be grateful and you will get the best service once they slow down. You may also get to sample the best wines, desserts,  and so on.
Recognize that Hospitality workers are human. They have families,  goals and maybe extraordinary circumstances to overcome just to get to work and be of service to you.
If you choose to smoke in a non – smoking hotel room, you are also choosing to pay the fine.
Trashing a hotel room may sound fun at first, but imagine if your family member were having to clean it up. These housekeepers have enough to do without the “extras” that are left behind.
Debit cards, well, are not the best way to pay for rooms. If any corrections need to be made, the banks those cards are thru -can take 5, 7 or even up to 10 days to process any refunds to the account. Hotels can process the corrections on there end but the bank is the one who controls when the money goes back to the account.
Okay – now I will flip over to the guest side:
I travel. A lot. I usually explore each city pretty thoroughly.  And I can get a little grumpy, restless and missing home. Suggest your favorite places for me to shop, dine and visit. If I ask – give me clear directions as “just up the road” can get me lost. Notice that maybe I am not having a good day and ask – how can we help? A visitor can feel very vulnerable in a new city and this is where true Hospitality steps in.
In Chicago now, and have discovered new eats- here is your next go to list for Chi-town:
Jake Melnick’s Corner Tap, great beer ( try the House Shandy) and the Sloppy Pig Sandwich.
Cantina Laredo – Blood Orange Sangria is amazing. Fabulous chips and salsa.
Coco Pazzo Cafe – the bread, oil and balsamic vinegar Is a good start. Felt truly welcomed and cared for. Beautiful art on walls as well.
Howells and Hood- great beers on tap and perfect place to watch the game.
That’s all for now but I will be in the windy city for a few more weeks and will hopefully keep discovering new places. Dine well my friends

Minn eeee sotaaaa

ahhh change. Yep – I said it.

I traded in my beloved Blackberry for a Samsung Galaxy, and did not require therapy 

Trading in my Indiana and Chicago assignments for Minnesota next week, even booked a flight and am not going to the doctor for happy pills to get me thru getting on the plane.

Yes, it’s totally appropriate to schedule a parade in my honor. Those are two big things. I can adjust, grow, mature and evolve. Who knew?

A close friend and writing partner is moving for a great job opportunity, and I am not planning some crazy scheme to get her back. Well, not yet. There is still time. I am proud and a little jealous of this brave step she is taking, and so I will be supportive. But she takes my sanity with her…

I went line dancing again and should do that more. Either that or work out – and we all know that unless they put a bar, play country music and let me wear cowboy boots on the treadmill in a gym, I have no desire to go.

Things I know about Minnesota – Prince is from there, and I will be dangerously close to Mall of America. That’s pretty much it. I have much to learn. This could be fun. Should someone warn the fine people of Minnesota? Probably.

I believe the boyfriend has perfected fall off the bone ribs in the smoker. I changed his picture on my phone to the picture I took of the ribs. I think there is a phrase about the way to a man’s heart is thru his stomach, I have one better… The way to this woman’s heart may be ribs. I think I even said something like – he should use that picture for Match.com if he ever dumps me. But I think I may have followed that with “don’t ever make another woman these ribs”. Or maybe I kept that inside for once.

My assignment in Bloomington IN ended this past week, I “onboarded” two new General Managers for my company which is just a fancy way of saying I did training and orientation with them. I learned some things in the process, which is always a win. My job continues to challenge me in all the right ways. I am, at my very core, a “fixer”. Don’t bring me a problem unless you want me to fix it. I am realizing that my aggressive nature and desire to jump in, take over, and wrap up a problem into a neat little package only benefits my ego. If I take a step back, observe and give others the space to grow – while giving support and feedback – I don’t “just fix it”, I facilitate growth in others. I tend to act fast, and ask questions later – great in some situations but doesn’t give much room to operate in teamwork mode.